ALAN CUMMING FAILS A CRAFTING LESSON AT THE MARTHA STEWART SHOW

Martha Stewart and Alan Cumming are seen during the production of "The Martha Stewart Show" in New York on Wednesday, December 1, 2010. Photo: David E. Steele/The Martha Stewart Show

Multi-talented actor, singer, writer and producer, Alan Cumming, got a lesson on multi-tasking on today’s edition of THE MARTHA STEWART SHOW (Hallmark Channel, 10 AM ET/9 AM C – same day encore airing, 2 PM ET/next day airing, 1 PM ET) when he joined Martha in the craft room to create a Sweetgum Fruit Wreath. While crafting Alan was proving to be a bit chatty and not crafty so Martha reminded him “The secret about crafting is that you keep doing it WHILE you’re talking!” It might have been too much to handle for Alan when they both realized his wreath wasn’t quite mirroring Martha’s. Just when Alan was about to surrender saying “I failed you Martha! I failed you!” she said “No, you failed YOU!” Failure or not, one thing’s for sure; He won’t be quitting his day job anytime soon.

http://www.marthastewart.com/clip-of-the-day-alan-cumming

ON NOT WINNING AN AWARD FOR “THE GOOD WIFE.”

MS: So Alan, you were in “The Good Wife.”

AC: I am.

MS: But last year you were and you won an award.

AC: Well, I was only nominated, Martha, I don’t want to talk about it.

MS: You were only nominated? Oh my god. Ohhh.

AC: John Lithgow won.

MS: Awwww. Are you jealous?

AC: Furious!

MS: Oh, I’m sorry. Maybe you’ll win this year!

AC: Maybe this year….. I knew. I arrived on the red carpet and this lady was like “Oh Alan, you didn’t win!” And I was like “No! That talentless biotch John Lithgow won!” And she didn’t get that I was joking and she went, “Over to you Simon, over to you.” It was hilarious and also Simon wasn’t ready so she had to come back and talk to me some more.

MS: John is a very talented actor also.

AC: LOVE, and he is a very kind man.

ON ALLIUM GIGANTEUMS AND LADY GAGA:

MS: Do you know what this is?

AC: I have an idea.

MS: What?

AC: Do you clean the toilet with it?

MS: Noooo. Oh come on! Think! It grows in the garden…

AC: It’s like some sort of grass?

MS: No. It’s an Allium Giganteum….

AC: That’s stunning. That’s like something Lady Gaga would have.

MS: Yep. Could you imagine? I should give these to her for her headdress.

AC: Have you ever had Lady Gaga on?

MS: Not yet!

AC: Oh, you should get her on here.

MS: Yeah, we’re waiting for her. She said she’d come one of these days.

ON ACCENTS AND IMPERSONATIONS:

MS: Your accent isn’t as strong [referring to his character on “The Good Wife]

AC: Well, it’s a strong American accent.

MS: Yeah, I’m amazed that you can get rid of your Scottish accent so easily.

AC: Well, you know. That’s why I get paid the big bucks Martha.

MS: Is Scottish your favorite accent? So, speak in New York!

AC: Martha [speaking in “New York”] I’m not a performing seal! [audience laughs].

MS: Oh, I didn’t mean that! You know I didn’t mean that.

AC: Well, what’s your accent?

MS: New Jersey.

AC: New Jersey. When you say “That’s a good thing.” [imitating Martha]

MS: See, you’re good at that. He can do it! He’s an actor!

AC: Imagine if I had a career impersonating you. Wouldn’t that be funny?

MS: No, absolutely not…. Saturday Night Live has impersonated me for years!

AC: Who’s done you?

MS: Ummm, that blonde lady. Ana Gasteyer.

AC: Oh, Ana Gasteyer. I love her! I was in a show with her.

MS: Perfect.

AC: They weren’t mean, I hope.

MS: Oh no, never! Saturday Night Live? They’re not mean. We love them all. She can’t do anything I do. She tries. Can’t do a thing!

AC: Wow.

ON CRAFTING:

MS: The secret about crafting is that you keep doing it WHILE you’re talking.

AC: Got it! Got it.

MS: And then you get stuff done.

AC: That’s right!

MS: Talk talk talk, multitask….. I think you’re doing it a little far apart [pointing to Alan’s wreath].

AC: Am I?

MS: Notice, this is the prototype.

AC: Oh gosh, do I have to go back?

MS: No… well, yeah, I think you do…

AC: I failed you Martha, I failed you!

MS: No, you failed you!

AC: I failed ME!

MS: That’s your wreath. You have to stay here longer and finish it!

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